He did what?

There's a man in one of the meetings my team supports who I just know was the playground bully when he was a kid. Whenever a new person comes into my group, I have to help them overcome their fear of working with him. It's not that he's a bad guy, but he's intimidating. An ex-cop with massive forearms and very little patience -- and no problem telling you what you're doing wrong. He's one of my favorite people now, but I clearly remember a time when I wasn't as sure of myself around him.

Not too long ago he and I were put on a project together. Around Valentine's Day he said he wanted to tell me about the gift he got his wife because he knew I'd appreciate it. He went to an antique store and bought an actual Victorian-era Valentine, one in the shape of a heart about the size of a dinner plate. He traced the heart and hand-drawn curlicues onto a piece of expensive wood (like teak or something) and used a jigsaw to cut them out, making a lace pattern out of the wood. Then he cut the "card" down the middle. He hinged these doors onto a solid piece of wood so they would unfold. Then he bought some aged-looking paper, like a thick, pulpy card stock, and printed the Valentine message on it. The paper showed through the card's window, making a very pretty presentation, and the final touch was a hanger on the back so it could be displayed on a wall.

Needless to say, I was impressed. Not just with the extent to which he'd gone to make Valentine's Day memorable for his wife of 17 years, but by the way his eyes lit up when he talked about her. I asked him if this was normal for him, and he told me about the curio cabinet he'd made for her wedding dress. It stands in the corner of one of their sitting rooms and has little lights that shine down, etc.

Someone came up to us then and said, "Hey, what are you guys doing?" I looked at the intruder and back at my friend and said, "[He's] melting my heart." And the intruder looked at my friend and then back at me and went, "Yeah, right."

Because seriously, who would believe that?

I was telling Maven Erica this story (in preparation for her meeting said friend) and she pointed out that the reason this is a story at all is because of who my friend is perceived to be. Nobody cares about the nice guy who makes the extensive Valentine's card for his wife. But the motorcycle-riding ex-cop with a chip on his shoulder who takes off work for her birthday every year? That's intriguing. That makes you stop and go awww.

May have to rethink my love-affair with beta heroes.

YOUR TURN: Tell us about someone you know who made you stop and think twice. A nice guy who did something mean, a mean guy who did something nice, a pastor who slept with a member of his congregation -- something that became news not because of what they did, but because of who you thought they were when they did it.